Jaycee Woods

While Boudica and The Butcher is a war story, the novel it is also a Beauty and the Beast story. The below snip ends with the question: “You told me that you love him. What does your loving him even mean?”

In the first chapter, Gideon Sheridan (aka The Butcher) asked a similar question when Asclepia (the medic) asked if he still loved his late wife. At that time, Gideon posited that to love someone is to not to be able to live without them and that since his wife died in a rebel terrorist car bomb he had become death as he pointed at a battlefield of corpses.

Boudica’s developing answer will focus on living with love and be essential to The Butcher’s redemption arc.

Standard caveat as the below snip remains raw.

**

When Boudica woke up, her master was gone. Laying alone in his bed, she noticed the absence of his boots and weapons suggesting that he had left the tent to begin his day. Boudica stretched to slowly wake herself up. As she lay between sleep and her day, she remembered a few things.

First, she thought about the dream that she had had as she could not forget the feeling. Held by her master in the dream, she clung to him hoping that would make that the moment he would use to conceive. Next, what her master said when she had told him about the dream; he understood her feelings. Yet he denied her because her malnourished body was not fit to carry his child. He would take her only when she would be.

As these two thoughts swam in her head, she began slowly smiling as she felt happy that she had his understanding. Even if he was a rough person, he was able to show a sweet side of himself as well.

Slowly, Boudica got out of the bed to begin getting ready for the day. She had a feeling that her master was expecting her to do some work for him. Boudica took a quick look around his tent as she wanted to make sure that nothing was out of place as he deserved orderly quarters.

Entering the tent, Olga said to Boudica, “I am pleased that you are not asleep in the furs.”

Greeting Olga with a smile, Boudica replied, “Yes, I just woke up. I know that I have…work to do.”

Olga asked, “Really? What work do you have planned?”

Thinking as she did not have an answer, Boudica stalled before replying, “My master hadn’t told me anything. He probably expects me to do some cleaning and take care of his tent.”

Olga instructed, “Your master can’t do all your thinking for you. Cleaning is good, but a brief task as your master does not keep unnecessary clutter. How can you make your master’s life better today? How can you solve a problem for him?”

Boudica thought. She wanted to impress Olga by demonstrating how well Boudica knew her master. “I can make him breakfast…as…I’m sure he would appreciate it.”

Olga said, “No other problems? Just the war, the siege, the wellbeing of his soldiers including the injured ones in the infirmary, his left eye remains blind from his swollen wound, he still has headaches and memory loss. No problems at all for you to consider.”

Blushing with embarrassment, Boudica felt guilty because she had not considered all the issues that her master had. She tried to cover her embarrassment by making excuses for herself. “I…I didn’t mean it like that when I said that…I know that you’re right…as…he’s had a rough time in this war.”

Based upon Olga’s disapproving glance, Boudica stopped talking. In her silence, Boudica focused on thinking, about her master and how the war was affecting him. She had a feeling that she had only begun to notice some effects from the war upon her master.

Caressing her own belly to feel the comfort of her growing child, Olga took a deep breath before reminding herself that Boudica could not yet understand Gideon as well as Olga understood her own Cyrus. Patiently Olga resumed, “Let me keep it simple. Did you make breakfast for him this morning?”

Frozen by embarrassment, Boudica had not considered that she should have already fed her master breakfast. She feared that she had made another serious mistake, “No…I didn’t…as…I didn’t know that I was supposed to make him anything since he got out of bed a bit earlier than me today.”

Without focusing on Boudica’s lack of forethought, Olga focused on the consequences, “Then he probably didn’t eat as that is his way. Maybe he grabbed an apple on the go. Do you think his last camp slave girl slept in late and let him go hungry in the morning? No, and now she has his baby.”

As she heard this, Boudica immediately began feeling worse as she did not even think about doing anything for him when he woke up and left the bed, “Yes…you’re right…as…I should’ve noticed that he was leaving the bed and I should’ve got up and made him something to eat…as…I’ve missed the opportunity to show him that I care about him.”

Olga smiled at Boudica’s realization, “Yes. That is the correct point. You failed to care for him. Has he done anything other than take care of you?”

Boudica gasped as if slapped by Olga’s words. She realized that she had not done anything for him besides following his orders. She understood that she had been completely dependent on him for everything. He saved her life. He healed her. He sheltered, fed, and watered her. He taught her. He protected her when Juicy wanted to kill her. He held her at night when she needed to be close to him.

As she realized that she had failed to reciprocate his care, her expression suddenly changed to a sad one, “No…he’s been taking care of me since I became his slave. I can’t honestly say that I have taken care of him. I have been displeasing, but he still cared for me.”

Olga asked, “Is that all you want to be to him? You told me that you love him. What does your loving him even mean?”